Salut, les amis!

"I have 61 wieners between my legs"

Good news, avid readers! There will be a post this week afterall. I found an english keyboard, and you know what that means -- being able to type properly! So usually every once in a while I sit down and write down ideas for what I might want to put in my blog or just rant to my self in a kind of a girly way kind of like a journal or whatever, but for the past week and a bit, something has gotten in the way. But in fact, this is the kind of distraction that you really makes traveling worth while. This week's cultural experience is:

Making Friends

Last time I wrote, I wrote about how crappy the weather was. What this means is that when the weather is crap, people are in bad moods, no one just hangs out around the campsite and pretty much everyone just keeps to themselves and does their own thing. Then, something magical happened, and I suppose it wasn't really magical in the sense of magic tricks or something, it was more just a figure of speach I used to describe the fact that having the weather do a complete 180 was pretty much sweet. So probably by now you can assume that yes, the magic was a change in weather. The only real way to meet people is when you pass them in the toilet area everyday and maybe say hi and then maybe go into town and drink at a bar, but that's expensive and as budget travelers, that's not really how to roll.

But then, nice weather puts all those grim people back into good moods and they all come out of their shells. The timing of our rain stoppage also conveniently coincided with the weekend, where more people come and when my good friend came down for a visit, and so graciously bought us a BBQ. Alright, anecdotes aside, this is the how to do.

Buy ping pong paddles. This is an easy opener for anyone, because no matter how little or much experience someone has at ping pong, they probably love it. And then they get better. That's what happens with practice. Then, they teach their friends and then everyone is better off knowing kind of how to play ping pong. Then Swedish people challenge you to a playoff, but are too drunk too early in the day, so they end up never showing up.

BBQs attract people. You if you have a hot smoking grill, people will join you. That's pretty much it. Obviously, you also have to let them know that they're welcome. So remember how once upon a time I wrote a lame post about BBQs? Well, if you wanted to know what the best kind is for making a cheap little one, then charcoal is the way to go. Artificial fire-assister starter tablets are also good too. (though I still prefer the ease of a good propane grill) A little grill can be pruchased for (let's say hypothetically) 16€ and will bring hours of joy and tons of cooked items. Also, buy a little one, because that way you can pretty much take it anywhere. Steaks are nice, but hot dogs will do...anywhere from 60-110 should feed 5-10 hungry people. BBQs at your neighbours' place are good, but you can also do it on your own campsite. You can also do it on the beach, though not legally.

Buy beer. Maybe a huge case. This is probably one of the best conversation starters there are. 'Hey, I'm Kai. Would you like to come drink beer with us and be friends?' Because even if they don't actually want a beer, they'll at least come over and be friends...unless they're boring. But you don't need boring friends anyway. This works even better if you already have a BBQ going. Beer and hot dogs...mmmm.


Also, being bilingual is also good, but it's not always necessary. Yesterday, we had a nearly fully french day, that was nice. French people are nice. One nice thing is just smiling at people, because when you smile, then they realize that you brush your teeth everyday and people like other clean people. But one really nice thing to do is to make friends with someone who has a car, like we did yesterday. Driving is always a luxury when you're on a walking holiday!

So that's how you do it, folks. To make friends, all you have to do (mostly) is talk to people. Any other suggestions I'd be more than happy to hear, because a single guy on the run could always use more friends!

The Other Side

So if you ever wanted to know what my travel buddy Dale is thinking, check the link on the side. His blog thingy is sponsored by the university he went to, entitled:

Dale, World traveler

May not have a post this week. I'm Lame.

But I DO HAVE tons of ideas!

Better than a burn

'Everybody feels better in a tan'

Bonjour, or that's what they'd have you believe anyway. Today is rainy...it's supposed to be sunny in beach towns, no? Otherwise no one would live there. Currently in the french surf town of Biarritz, livin' it up in the cloudy, windy, though surprisingly pleasant beach town mentality. Less than a week ago, we came from a different coastal town, though it is port town, so beaches were not quite as nice. La Rochelle boasted what we would call an excellent base tan, if not a burn, and now I'm just waiting for the last of my back to fall off (as well as the sun to start shining in Biarritz before I can get back to my favorite look. This week's cultural topic is:

TANNING

Tans, like most anything else, come in varying degrees. In education, you can get a high school diploma, a bachelor's degree, master's degree or PhD. In tanning, it's kind of the same, only with tans, the degree is the degree of attractiveness that is held in a certain kind of tan.

The Farmer's tan. This is probably the most common type of tan, since most people don't get the chance to actually take off their t-shirt in the sun, and unfortunately, many that do probably shouldn't. But admittedly, farmer's tan is probably better than no tan at all. The tan ends mid-upper arm and looks alright until you wear a shirt that has short sleeves. Then, you're the laughing stalk of the town.

Beater tan. The more politically correct name for this tan would be atheletic vest tan. If you aren't going to have a proper full tan you might as well have this one. Full arm coverage, as well as shoulder and neck and upper chest, you can wear virtually any shirt and fool even the best of us into thinking you're fully covered. It's the white stomach and back that doesn't look too appealing. But definitely one step up from the farmer type.

Shorts tan. For girls, this may also be the equivalent to a bikini tan, covering just about as much as decently possible without actually going in the buff. Nice coverage everywhere on the body except for parts below the belt, and may actually be blinding when the shorts come off, but you live with it because you feel good and look even better.

And then there's the tan's arch nemesis: The burn. The burn always happens so suddenly and it always happens to the people who think they're invincible (like me), but obviously aren't. But the burn is just a real bitch. The worst part about it is the itchy feeling that comes about 4 days later. Day 1: You burn, it hurst. Day 2: it's tender, but it's not red anymore. Day 3: the burn starts to change colour to a more tanned looking brown, and thoughts like 'maybe I'll be alright afterall' come to mind. Then Day 4: it happens. And it hurts. The next few days are alright, but you just don't want to walk around without a top on because it's going to look pretty crappy...all peeling-like.

Of course, just like university degrees, you can get both REAL and FAKE tans. Real ones, obviously, can look a little funny, probably don't have completely even colour, maybe a little white triangle under your chin or something like that, maybe on your chest it'll be a little whiter, just because the sun always comes from the top...not the bottom, but the clearest way to distinguish a real tan from a fake one is once you get your knickers off. WHITE. Unless, you don't have naturally light coloured skin, in which case it will be whatever colour that is naturally...the point is it'll be a lighter shade than the rest of your body.

Just for good measure, here are the best parts about being tanned. You feel better. Your skin feels smoother. Muscles? What are muscles - you have a tan! Reaching out for something and noticing that you have tanned hands is probably the best part about being tanned, but that's probably an entire post in itself. The best part of the tan, though? Knowing that you've spent your time and money wisely.

You ever been on vacation and someone in your group says something like 'looks like the bad weather followed us here'? And you just want to hit them, because what are the chances that out of the 6 billion people in the world the bad weather just decided to follow YOU? Well, maybe it would be easier if the bad weather just never showed up in the first place; that way we could all just be happier in our tans.

LE BigMac

'I don't know, I never went to Burger King.'

If you've never been to France, you should at least try out their bloody computer keyboards - frustrating? Yeah, maybe a little. On a lighter note: McDonalds. I normally try to go in a new country without becoming a victim of corporate America as long as I possibly can, but this trip, it took only about a week and a half. If you have ever tried to stay under 20€ a day in spending in a place that travel books recommend budgeting at least 40-50, you'll know that all you can really afford is bread, cheese, and maybe some sandwich meat, if you've been a good boy... This week's FRENCH cultural topic is:

LA GASTRONOMIE

Now, I realise that I've actually talked about food a number of times, but let's get serious. English food is not really THAT good. Now obviously everyone loves fish and chips every once in a while (unless you're allergic to fish, I suppose) but if there's one thing the French love to be good at, it's French Cuisine. Strangely enough, they even named it in their own language! Everyone who has seen the great Pulp Fiction already knows it, but the biggest difference in fast food is this: Big Mac is the same, Fillet of Fish is McFish, quater pounder = Royal Cheese, and in Paris you can get beer on tap. As far as McDo goes, that's really all there is to it.

Crepes. Crepes, in case you've never had the pleasure, are really thin pancake kind of things that are served with sweet things in the middle - like butter, honey, fruit, or the most popular of all, nutella (chocolate hazelnut spread - which, due to technical difficulties, i cannot eat). But if sweet is not what you're looking for, look no further! You'll love les galettes. Galettes are based on the same idea, but instead of sugary filling, you'll find delicious meats, cheeses, maybe some eggs, maybe some vegetables...perfect for dinner or a heavy afternoon, morning or late night snack!

Croque Monsieur. Picture this: ham baked in between two slices or bread with cheese melted on top. This is the typical kind of food one might find in a Brasserie/bar. AKA bar food. Serve that up with some fries and you're laughing. Add a fried egg, you've got yourself a Croque Madame. C'est facile, ein?!

Le Café. Ever gone into that crappy little coffee shop around the corner from your place and just said 'dang, I really wish I could just get a really nice double espresso that didn't taste like feet'? We'll I'll be the first to tell you that in France, that's never a problem. In France they laugh at the idea of 'filter coffee' and when you order a coffee, it's fresh and it's good.

Le Menu. This is not a foreign concept, but it's what we might call a set-meal. Anywhere from 2 to 7 courses from prices of 8 to 50€, France offers the combination you're looking for. Yeah, we splurged the one day and went for a 15er. But picture this: aperitif, oysters (huites) for the appetizer, marinated mussles (moules) for the entry, mutton chops and potatoes (mouton), goat cheese digestif, and top that puppy off with a mousse au chocolat. Delicious? Yes. Also the first time I've had oysters since I was 8.

Of course, you could always play it cheap (like we do most days) and stick to the baguette and camembert, but don't forget the WINE!